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The Trouble with Henge

On another sunny afternoon in Konoha, Umino Iruka walked absent-mindedly from the Academy building, unaware of another dark cloud on the horizon. He was thinking seriously about his relationship with the ramen girl, right on the precipice of asking her to marry him. Iruka was now 99 percent sure that he loved Ayame and that she was the only one for him. But that single percentage point kept him from taking the leap. If only it were socially acceptable for a woman to make the proposal. But that would make him look like a wimp. Even worse, he was supposed to be the fearless, strong shinobi, whose duty was to protect the civilians. How would it look if he weren't the one who proposed?

The cautious chuunin also thought about Ayame's feelings. Used to being analytical and teaching the physics of weaponry at the Academy, he tried to quantitate not only his love for her, but hers for him. He felt that she loved him about 95 percent though sometimes while cuddling in bed, he would increase that figure to about 98 percent, but it wasn't the 100 percent that he required.

That 2-5 percent, though he tried to deny it and ignore it, was still because of Kakashi. He had seen Ayame leave Kakashi's apartment building that time when Iruka sought to visit the gray haired shinobi. Though it was over a month ago, it stuck in his mind and he wondered exactly why she was there. She had not mentioned it at all and he was too afraid to ask.

"Hey hey Iruka sensei!" Naruto called out after the pensive young man who walked right by him without saying hello.

"Huh? Oh, it's you, Naruto, hi."

"That's probably the crappiest hello you've ever given me!" the blonde genin complained, not realizing that something was wrong with the usually chipper chuunin.

"Sorry, I just have something on my mind.in fact.do you have a minute?" Iruka asked distractedly.

"Sure, what's up? How about we talk about it over ramen, your treat?" Naruto suggested hopefully.

"No, no ramen."

"What? Why not?!" Naruto asked in a panic.

"I need to talk about Ayame."

"Ayame?"

"The ramen girl!"

"Oh, yeah, so how's that going? I thought you guys were getting along great. Hey, you're not thinking about Kakashi sensei again are you?" Naruto asked, thinking of the rumor from a month ago that implied Iruka had a crush on Kakashi.

"What the hell are you saying? No! This has nothing to do with Kakashi! Wait.it does, but it's not what you think!" responded Iruka defensively, blushing a deep shade of red.

"Uh, huh." the boy gave Iruka a doubtful look.

"Look, I'm think about proposing to Ayame."

"Proposing? Proposing what? Like a new menu item? I think twice cooked shredded pork would make a great ramen topping and." Naruto interrupted, thinking desperately of lunch.

"No! I meant proposing marriage. Just be quiet and let me finish."

Naruto shrugged and finally stopped interrupting.

"I've been thinking of asking her to marry me, but I can't help but think that deep down she still prefers Kakashi. I mean, I'm about 95 to 98 percent sure about us but I'd like to be 100 percent sure that she doesn't want Kakashi anymore."

"So what? Who cares about the math? You're not like teaching a class or something. Kakashi sensei isn't interested in her." Naruto couldn't help saying.

"Not now but what if he changes his mind?"

"I doubt it, he's got his books to keep him happy, right? But.hey I've got a great idea!"

Iruka should have known better. He should have turned around right then and there and escaped from Naruto's annoying screechy voice. After all, Naruto's great ideas usually led to trouble.

-.-.-.-.-

"Okay, I'll transform to Kakashi sensei and then hit on the ramen girl. You watch from here." Naruto said as the two viewed the ramen stand from behind a tree.

"Wait.you don't have to do this, I can do this myself." Iruka started to have serious reservations about Naruto's plan.

"Do you really think you can keep your cool if she shows she still likes Kakashi sensei?"

"Well.no I guess not.but here, wear the radio transmitter so I can listen in."

"I'll give you a full report. What's the matter? Don't you trust me?"

"No.I mean I do, but I want to hear it for myself. I don't want any misinterpretations," Iruka said, thinking of how Naruto screwed things up the first time by telling him Ayame liked him when she really liked Kakashi.

"Fine, I'll wear the transmitter. I can't believe you don't trust me after all this time!"

"And by the way, no touching!" Iruka warned.

Naruto attached the transmitter to his inside collar then transformed into Kakashi, complete with the little red book in hand. Iruka watched from behind the tree as Naruto approached the ramen stand. Iruka fidgeted with the radio receiver in his ear and heard Naruto mutter something about Iruka sensei owing him ten bowls of ramen for this effort.

It was already mid-afternoon when Naruto-Kakashi sauntered over to Ichiraku. There were no customers around so he was free to say and do whatever he planned. "Hello there Ayame-chan." Naruto-Kakashi said smoothly in Kakashi's low luscious lulling voice.

"Good afternoon Kakashi sensei!" Ayame greeted him brightly.

"I see you're not busy right now, mind if I keep you company?"

"Oh please do!"

"You're looking quite beautiful today, as always of course," said Naruto-Kakashi using lines Iruka had suggested.

"And so do you!"

"Me? That's very sweet of you." Naruto-Kakashi walked behind the counter and up to the ramen girl.

"Would you like something to drink? I have some sake here. It's the cheap stuff but it'll still give you a buzz," she offered with a smile and a wink.

"Sake? At this time of day? No I don't think so." Naruto-Kakashi responded while thinking, 'I didn't realize she's a lush like old lady Tsunade!'

"Come on! What are you afraid of? 'Fraid someone might see you without your mask? What's the big deal? Let's have a look."

Ayame came really really close to Naruto-Kakashi, so close he could smell the alcohol on her breath. "Hey, how about we go to the back and.work on your noodle." she said seductively.

"Huh?" Naruto-Kakashi did not understand the double entendre of noodle terminology, but it seemed like something inappropriate. "Where's your father? What about the customers." he asked in desperation.

"Who cares? It's just you and me and a kage bunshin will make three." Ayame said in a low husky voice much unlike her usual girlie one.

Iruka, who had been listening in, was horrified! 'What the hell?! Naruto didn't make a move on her and she's already all over him!'

"Well.er.thanks for the offer but what about Iruka-sensei?"

"Iruka who?" she blinked her rather bloodshot eyes in confusion.

"Your boyfriend!"

"Him? That loser? He's just a chuunin. I want a real man and only jounin qualify!"

"That's a terrible thing to say! He really loves you!"

"Whatever, why talk about him? We should talk about us, or rather, forget the talking," Ayame said as she reached out toward Naruto-Kakashi. He expected her to go for the mask, but she suddenly switched gears and went for the lower region. Naruto-Kakashi almost lost his concentration and transformation and knew it was time to get out of there, fast. He had seen enough and poor Iruka-sensei had probably heard way too much.

"S.sorry.gotta go!" Naruto-Kakashi said as he quickly turned, concentrated chakra to his feet, and ran off,.

"Damn! He got away again!" muttered Ayame crossly.

-.-.-.-

Iruka was shocked, more than shocked, he was near catatonic when Naruto returned.

"Sorry Iruka-sensei, but it's better to know now, isn't it?" his little friend said sympathetically.

"I.I wish I never knew," Iruka managed to say. He was near tears but resolved not to cry again in front of Naruto (the first time in the incident involving Mizuki was embarrassing enough), yet his eyes were red and the edges were wet. "I guess this is it. I finally know the truth. So that's what she really thinks of me, a loser," he sighed sadly.

"You're not a loser! You're the greatest guy I know! I'm sure any woman would want you!" Naruto said encouragingly. 'What is wrong with that ramen girl?' Naruto thought angrily to himself. 'What woman in her right mind would prefer Kakashi-sensei to Iruka-sensei? I just don't get it. It's like Sakura and Sasuke. He treats her like crap and she still wants him. Hmm.maybe that's it.'

"Apparently not," Iruka replied. "I mean, for her to call me a loser.she's just a ramen waitress!"

"That's right, you could do better!" Naruto readily agreed.

"Yeah, you're right!" Iruka started to feel a bit better, but then thought, 'To be dissed by someone as lowly as a ramen waitress.that's just too much to bear.'

"Go for one of the kunoichi sensei." Naruto suggested.

"I should, shouldn't I? We'd have a lot more in common."

"That's right! There's Suzume-sensei, Kurenai-sensei, Anko-sensei, and even old lady Tsunade."

"But they're all such bitches!"

"Well, yeah, that's true, but.Shizune nee-chan is really nice!"

"You're right, she is. Hmm.I should consider her..." But then Iruka thought how Shizune was a jounin and he was just a lowly chuunin. How would it look to have a wife who could kick his ass? And who made more money and.

Then Naruto added, "But you should know.I've been hearing rumors about her.so forget all that, I have a better idea! The reason why that ramen girl wants Kakashi-sensei is because.he doesn't want her!"

At first, Iruka was about to scoff at that idea, but the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. After all, he had dumped Ayame twice already and each time she wanted him back more badly than before. Maybe what she really wanted was a guy who didn't want her. That made sense in a bizarre twisted way. But he didn't want someone that.contrary or crazy. "If she wants Kakashi more than she wants me, then just forget it," he said resignedly.

"You're not going to fight for her?"

"I'm tired of having all these doubts. Now that they've been confirmed, what's the point? I mind as well save face and save myself some heartache," Iruka said but added to himself, 'And some money, all those flowers and non-ramen dinners really eat into a chuunin's savings!' He sighed again and said, "I just want someone who just wants me." 'And who doesn't know Kakashi exists!'

"So you're gonna dump her again?"

"I'm going to end our relationship equitably."

"But she might want you more after that."

"It'll be final. Final. Absolutely final!" Iruka resolved.

-.-.-.-

Hours later, after Iruka had plenty of time to angst about his life, he dropped by the ramen stand near closing. Ayame smiled broadly and waved to him as he approached, but he just nodded mutely and stood by the counter, eyeing her coldly.

"What's the matter Iruka-kun?" she asked, concerned.

"It's over," he said, turning his head, without looking at her.

"What's over?"

"We are."

"What are you talking about?" She blinked in confusion.

"Our relationship, which was built on lies to start with, is over, absolutely final," Iruka said while meeting her beautiful soft brown eyes. He had spoken more bitterly than he had originally intended.

"Huh? What the hell? Why? Again?" she asked in disbelief. Things were going very well since that time when Iruka thought he was in love with Kakashi. That was over a month ago, and since then, they had been very close. So close, she was sure he was about to advance to the next stage.

"You know why. Why don't you just hook up with Kakashi again. He's the one you really want!" Iruka accused angrily. He had resolved to maintain his composure, but for some reason, just looking at her confused, guileless face made him really angry. That such an innocent face was capable of such deception.it was unforgivable!

"That again? Why are you so obsessed with him?" she asked in annoyance. "You're the one who obsesses about him! Not me! You're the one who brings him up all the time! You're the one who wants him! If you're playing me, if you've really decided this is over, this better be the last over! I'm not taking you back after you dumped me three times! I have some dignity! No backsies!" Ayame shouted.

"Backsies? What adult talks like that?" Iruka said rather cruelly.

"So you're making fun of my intelligence now? I'm just a dumb civilian, right? Not a smart classy kunoichi? Don't think a poor ramen waitress is good enough for you? Well, take this!" Ayame dumped the remnants of a ramen bowl over Iruka's head. She ran off to the back room crying loudly.

Her father came out from the back to see what the hell was going on this time between his daughter and her suitor. One look at Iruka's guilty face, and the bowl on his head, told him everything. "You dumped her again didn't you?" he accused.

Iruka nodded mutely but blushed in shame over his poor treatment of Ayame. The soup dripped into his eyes, but he ignored the discomfort and made no move to clean himself up. Breaking up this time was much, much harder.

"A bad relationship is like a bowl of cold leftover ramen. Sometimes it's better off in the trash. But you know. I really thought you were a good guy. Good enough for my daughter. Guess I was wrong. You know, she may not be the fanciest of toppings, but she really loves you. Don't show your face around here again, unless you want something with extra legs in your ramen," her father threatened.

Poor Iruka gave him a slight nod of acknowledgement before he returned to his empty apartment.

-.-.-.-.-

Despite all that happened between his sensei and the ramen girl, it was still Naruto's favorite place to eat. And the turbulent affairs of adults did not concern him. So the next day, Naruto returned to eating lunch at Ichiraku.

"I don't understand it. What is it with your sensei? He's like so.insecure, especially when it comes to Kakashi," Ayame said while serving Naruto his roast pork ramen. She sniffed and blinked back what few tears had remained from a night of sobbing into her pillow. She couldn't even say Iruka's name. To keep her mind off her break up, she had worked extra hard on kneading the noodles.

"Well, you certainly can't blame him considering what hap."

"What do you know about this? Tell me!" Ayame practically jumped on top of Naruto from behind the counter.

"Huh? Nothing! I know absolutely nothing about anything! Wait...that doesn't sound right."

"Tell me or.you'll never be allowed to eat here ever again! No ramen ever! Just think about that!" she threatened.

Naruto now had to choose between his loyalty to his favorite sensei and ramen. It was not a terribly difficult choice - he chose ramen in about one nanosecond.

"Well, yesterday, Iruka-sensei wanted to know if you were 100 percent over Kakashi-sensei so I transformed into Kakasei-sensei and you."

"Yesterday? I didn't see Kakashi at all yesterday. What are you talking about?"

"Yesterday, mid-afternoon. There wasn't anyone else around. I don't know where your dad was but you wanted to go to the back and make noodles or something with me.er I mean with Kakashi-sensei."

Realization dawned on the desperate young woman on what truly transpired yesterday.

-.-.-.-.-

Ayame 's father was not feeling well. She decided to take him home but was loathe to close down the ramen stand as she was already preparing a new batch of stock for the evening rush. Then she spied Anko walking by. Though Anko frequented the dumpling restaurant, she did pick up ramen takeout every so often, so Ayame knew her by name though not of her reputation. "Anko-sensei!" she called. "Can you please so me a favor?"

Anko looked over at the ramen girl and nodded cautiously.

"Can you just watch the stand for a few minutes? It's the slow time of day so there probably won't be any customers. Just keep an eye on the stock for me, okay? I'm taking my dad home since he's not feeling well, but I should be back in just a few minutes," Ayame said while thinking, 'Well more like 20 minutes.'

"No problem," said Anko, "I can handle just watching the stock. Just don't expect me to serve anyone. That's not my style."

"Thanks so much!"

Anko started getting bored after a few minutes. She waited impatiently for Ayame to return. Several people had called out to her, "Hey Anko, what are you doing here? This a mission for you? Ha-ha! Protect the ramen stand from thieves or from Naruto?" She started to get tired of the jokes and decided to transform into Ayame. That way, people would no be wiser and would leave her alone. She busied herself by snooping around the stand and saw the bottle of sake that they kept for their regular customers. Anko could not resist helping herself to a cup or two or more of the sake. Then she spied Kakashi approaching.

-.-.-.-.-

".so that's what must have happened!" Ayame explained.

"Now that makes sense," Naruto nodded. "Anko-sensei is such a psycho bitch, no wonder she said those terrible things about Iruka-sensei. I'm sure once I explain things to him he'll."

"No! Forget it! I'm sick of his insecurities. I don't want him back even if he were the last man on earth.well.maybe only in that case. I want someone who's confident, someone's who's never weak but always strong, someone who'll defend me whether I'm right or wrong, someone to open each and every door." (from Bob Dylan's "It Ain't Me Babe")

-.-.-.-.-

".so that's what happened, Iruka sensei," Naruto explained immediately after lunch, even calling out Iruka in the middle of class.

"So it was that psycho bitch Anko! No wonder! Geez I can't believe this! I have to get Ayame back!"

"Well, she says she doesn't want you back unless you were the last man on earth. So that's pretty hard to do I think."

"She's just upset right now, I'm sure by tomorrow some flowers will do it," Iruka said with a confidence he did not feel.

-.-.-.-.-

Next morning, Iruka immediately headed over to the flower shop with lots of cash in hand. He found Ino misting the flowers with a spray bottle.

"I'd like three dozen." he was about to say when Ino cut in.

"Sorry Iruka-sensei, if that's for the ramen girl, it's no sale."

"What do mean?"

"She's paid me NOT to sell flowers to you if it's for her," Ino explained while thinking, 'Saving the flowers for another sale means double the profit! And what kind of man would repeatedly dump a girl? Everyone thinks Iruka-sensei is such a nice guy. Wait till this gets out! ' She then added to Iruka's horror, "Now if you'd like to send flowers to someone else.like Kakashi-sensei."

-.-.-.-.-

Unconditional Love

Ayame was over being angry. Now she was just depressed despite agreeing with her father that there were plenty of noodles in the vat. She had resolved that even if Iruka were to beg on his knees, she would not take him back. But was she wrong? After all, it was an honest mistake, sort of. Actually, it wasn't. He was testing her and it was just a fluke that Anko had taken over for that short period of time. Ayame was certain she would have passed the test and be no wiser and right now maybe she'd be happily engaged. But engaged to a man who would desperately stoop to deception because of his own insecurities. She wasn't wrong in her decision, but.

Ayame spied Sakura passing by the ramen stand on her way to training. She called out to the pink haired girl and waved her over. Sakura had heard the latest gossip, from Naruto of course, but was not in the mood to listen to more of Ayame's troubled love life, considering her own was no better, or rather, even worse. But she walked over anyway, thinking maybe she could learn something from the older girl, like how to not screw up a relationship.

"Sakura-chan," Ayame began, "I hope you don't mind if I ask you something, maybe personal, girl talk, you know."

Sakura smiled weakly, thinking 'You can ask, doesn't mean I have to answer. And now that you're free, as long you keep your hands off Sasuke, we're fine.' But she said aloud, "Sure, no problem. What is it?"

"You like that boy Sasuke, right?"

Sakura nodded cautiously. Inner Sakura: 'Hands off Sasuke! Or prepare for a kunai in your gut!'

"Actually, you love him don't you? For a long time?"

Again Sakura nodded, wondering where this was headed.

"But he barely deigns to give you the time of day, right?"

Sakura frowned. She did not like where this was headed at all.

"But you still love him anyway. Why?"

Sakura sighed. Sasuke was always a touchy subject with her. Despite her academic excellence, she never analyzed why she loved Sasuke, she just did, with all her heart. Trying to explain this would take some time, so she took a seat at the counter. "Love isn't something you can explain is it?" she asked the older girl.

"Sure it is. I thought I loved Kakashi because he's so cool and good-looking. Sigh, I loved Iruka because he was such a sweet guy and was so considerate and nice. Until what he pulled yesterday! Did you hear about that?" Ayame narrowed her eyes slightly, wondering if Naruto had already spread the word.

Sakura shook her head innocently.

"He put me through a test because he didn't trust me! He thought I might still have some lingering feelings for Kakashi so he had Naruto transform into Kakashi and try to seduce me! Except it wasn't me, it was actually Anko who was me. Anyway, how do you forgive something like that? If Sasuke did that to you, would you take him back?"

"Yes. It just shows how much he wants you to love him."

"But love is about trust isn't it? I trust him. I really don't think he has any feelings for Kaka.er.you didn't hear that last part. (Ayame didn't know that most of Konoha had already heard about Iruka's crush on Kakashi.) He should love me no matter what!"

"Well, I love Sasuke unconditionally. I don't need him to love me back, though I wish for it with all my heart. Even if he couldn't love me, or if he loved someone else, it wouldn't change my feelings for him." Sakura felt happy about being able to discuss her feelings freely with someone. There was no one else she could really talk to about Sasuke. All the other girls envied her and hated her for being on Sasuke's team. Her parents would just laugh it off as a silly crush. And forget about Naruto and Kakashi, those idiots didn't understand anything.

"Even if he did something bad? Really bad?"

"I would forgive him, if he's sorry for it."

"And if he's not?"

"I would still love him and help him. You can't just change your feelings so easily."

"So you think I should forgive Iruka-sensei?"

Sakura shrugged and said wisely, "That's up to you. Everyone is different."

-.-.-.-

Later that day, after their morning's training session, Sasuke went to Ichiraku for lunch while Naruto had to go elsewhere to meet with Iruka.

Sasuke was tentative about eating lunch there after Naruto had told him the latest gossip, whether he wanted to hear it or not. The ramen girl, he noticed, tended to let her emotions affect her ramen, a very bad habit. But he was in a hurry and had little pocket money today, so he resigned himself to ordering ramen with meatballs. To his relief, the girl took his order and served him in silence.

But she seemed to be studying him and after a while, Ayame presumed to ask him, "You know Sasuke-kun, all the young girls in Konoha seem to have a crush on you. But you don't seem to be interested."

Sasuke ignored her and concentrated on eating his noodles without spilling a drop of soup. 'Busybody bitch.'

"What do you think of unconditional love?" she asked.

He continued to ignore her.

Ayame persisted, "You know, sort of like what a mother feels for her children, among family."

Sasuke abruptly looked up from his noodles to say, "Unconditional love is a fallacy. Nothing like that truly exists. There is always something that is unforgivable. Like a massacre." His words and tone were cold enough to cool down the bowl of hot ramen.

"Yeah.er.I see your point." Ayame sighed. She should have known better than to ask his opinion.

-.-.-.-

Meanwhile Naruto was having lunch with Iruka at the dumpling house. Naruto scarfed down his dumplings a bit reluctantly, missing his usual ramen, but since Iruka was paying, he didn't complain. Instead he uncharacteristically remained silent thinking about his poor sensei's situation and guiltily about how it was his plan and his fault. He resolved to come up with another plan to help.

The two ate in sad silence until Naruto suggested, "I have another plan."

"Please, no, no more of your plans," Iruka replied with a frown.

"But I swear this is a good one! It'll work!" Before Iruka could protest again, Naruto launched into his new great idea, "I'll pretend to kidnap her and you'll come to save her and she'll forgive you!"

Iruka shook his head in disapproval, "That's too drastic and underhanded. I can't do something like that. Though it's not really a bad idea." He added the last part in desperate consideration.

"It's a great idea! Trust me!"

"That's what I thought the last time. Forget it, I'll work this out myself. Just need some time."

"Some time for her to fall for someone else! Remember, a stitch in time saves.eight or nine?"

"Yes, but haste makes waste."

"Sigh, why do they teach us those contrary things in school?"

"Well, it depends on the situation.look, I just need to go talk to her again. She's probably cooled off by now."

"Yeah, cooled off toward you!"

"You're not helping me by saying that!"

"So why are you hanging around and asking help from a twelve year old?"

"Good question. This is an adult problem and I'll handle it myself, like an adult," Iruka said with determination.

"Well, whatever, if it doesn't work, you know where to find me," Naruto replied as he stuck his chopsticks into his last dumpling.

-.-.-.-

After classes, Iruka managed to scrounge up some wildflowers to bring over to the ramen stand but Ayame was nowhere in sight.

"Look, you've dumped my daughter three times already. What makes you think, I'll give you another chance? Beat it!" Ayame's father said to Iruka when he asked to see Ayame, who had quickly ducked to the back as soon as she saw Iruka approaching, leaving her father as her protector.

"I just want to talk to her.to apologize."

"She's had enough of your apologies and your stupid flowers! Did you ever once think about getting her a freakin' vase for them? Guess who has to buy all the vases? They're more expensive than the stupid flowers! Beat it or I'll report you to Tsunade-sama for harassment! You know how tough she can be!"

Iruka's face blanched and he swallowed hard. Last thing he needed was to get in trouble with the new Hokage. But still he persisted, "If you can tell her it was all a misunderstanding .just a minute is all I need."

"You have ten seconds to disappear from my sight or else." He raised the boiling pot of stock threateningly.

Iruka sighed and resigned himself to finding another route of approach.

-.-.-.-

Ayame was trying to relax by drinking sake (rather than cutting vegetables) in the room behind the ramen stand when she heard a soft knock at the door. When she turned her head she found the purple-haired snake-master jounin standing before her, looking rather repentant.

"Hi, your father let me back here to talk to you in private," Anko explained. "I'm sorry about what happened the other day. Hope nothing bad resulted, ha-ha."

"No, it was actually a good lesson." Ayame took another cup and poured Anko a drink too.

"Don't be too hard on Iruka-sensei, he's really a great guy."

"That's what I thought but." Ayame handed the cup of sake to Anko.

"There's no chance of you forgiving him? I mean, I feel real bad about all this... it's all my fault. Maybe you can give him another chance after you've had a chance to think about it." Anko took a swallow of the sake and started choking.

"Hah! Take that!" Ayame said crossly. "That's for screwing up my life! All you shinobi think you're so much better than us civilians! Well I can't jutsu you but I sure can put hot sauce in sake! One with 90 percent capsaicin!"

Anko gagged and sputtered and lost her transformation.

Iruka now stood before Ayame. 'Crap, I thought if I transformed myself to look like someone else, then I could get her alone. Hot sauce! Can't believe she would try that with Anko! If it were the real Anko, Ayame would be in the hospital with multiple snakebites by now. Crap, she's really ticked off. I'm done for.'

"You? You used that trick on me, again? Never trust a shinobi! Well, at least you had the balls this time to do it yourself and not enlist your little friend. I first thought it was Kakashi's fault that we had problems, then I thought it was me, but it's not. It's been you all along! I'm sick of your wishy-washy insecurities! I want someone to love me unconditionally! Get out!" the ramen girl yelled, punctuating her order by pointing at the door, then she grabbed a fistful of freshly cut noodles.

Her suitor meekly complied without protest.

Whom else could he turn to for love advice? He had no parents or siblings and shinobi rarely talked about their feelings. There was just Naruto, who he suspected really just cared about free ramen for life, and Ino who he knew cared only about selling him more flowers. Pathetic.

Ayame was right - he was insecure and he did not trust her. But why, why couldn't he trust her when he trusted everyone else? He trusted his comrades; he believed in his students, including Naruto. And he even believed that his friend Mizuki, who had turned bad, would somehow revert back to the caring boy and man he once knew.

Ayame had done nothing deceitful, that he knew of. She had always been honest with him, as far as he knew. But now that he saw the light, it was too late. She wasn't going to speak to him again. Suddenly Naruto's suggestion wasn't looking too bad.

-.-.-.-

The Kidnapping

Unbeknownst to the troubled lovebirds, they were being observed by three men, clad in gray, not native to Konoha.

"That's her isn't it?" asked the oldest brother.

"Yes, we saw them together at the ramen stand the other day, being quite intimate," said his younger brother.

"Yeah, she had her hands all over him," said the youngest brother.

"What about that other guy she's been seen with?" asked the oldest brother.

"The scarred nose guy? He's nobody important," replied the second brother.

"Yeah, I just saw her throwing noodles at him, screaming at him and chasing him away from the ramen stand," replied the third brother.

"Right, let's get her."

-.-.-.-

'Another day, another ryou.' Kakashi had just exited the administrative building after filing the day's status report. He was just about to take out his book for some light reading when...

"Kakashi-sensei! Kakashi-sensei!" Ayame's father called out.

"Hmm?" Kakashi looked passively at the frantic old man who then shoved a note in Kakashi's face. It was addressed to the gray haired jounin.

To: Hatake Kakashi
We have the goil. If yu want her bak alive cum to the old bulding 2 miles SE past the bambu forist at 6pm tonite aloan.

"Hmm..." Kakashi said pensively after reading the note. "I'm sorry but I have a mission right now."

"But...my daughter! She's in danger! Don't you care?" the old man said angrily.

Kakashi shrugged. "Sorry, but she's not my concern. It's not an official mission. Why don't you ask Iruka-sensei to handle this."

"The note is addressed to you! And he's just a pathetic chuunin!"

"I have every confidence that Iruka-sensei can handle this. He's actually a pretty good chuunin," the masked shinobi replied calmly.

"I can't take that risk! My daughter deserves the best!"

"Thanks for the compliment, but she'll be fine, nothing to worry about, sorry, gotta go," Kakashi said as he disappeared before the old man could say another word.

-.-.-

"Iruka-sensei! Iruka sensei!" someone called.

On his way home from the Academy, where he had been busy with extra paperwork forced upon him by the other teachers, Iruka was lost in his somber thoughts and nearly walked right into Ayame's father who shoved a piece of paper into his face.

"My daughter's been kidnapped!" exclaimed the old man.

"Kidnapped?" Iruka said in surprise. He had not yet given Naruto the go ahead, but he naturally assumed Naruto had taken action without him. He looked down at the note and read "We have the goirl. If yu want her bak alive cum to the old bulding 2 miles SE past the bambu forist at 6pm tonite aloan."

To Iruka's confusion, the note was addressed to Kakashi. 'That Naruto, he must be rubbing it in!' Iruka rationalized. Considering the misspellings in the note, it had to have been written by a twelve year old with a six year old intelligence.

"I know it's addressed to Kakashi-sensei, but he's on a mission, and I didn't know who to ask. Do you know of any jounin available? I don't have time to go through bureaucratic paperwork at the Hokage's office and who knows what they'd do if I reported it to Tsunade-sama."

Iruka flushed at the probably unintentional insult. "We don't have time to find someone else. It's almost six already. I can handle it," he said confidently.

The old man eyed him critically, thinking, 'He's only a chuunin but he definitely cares more about Ayame than that bastard Kakashi. Can I trust him to rescue my daughter? It's like spinach ramen where it doesn't seem that good at first but after a while it's actually better than you expected.'

He finally gave Iruka a nod of approval.

-.-.-.-

'That Naruto, taking action without me, have to get him back for this. This is all his fault in the first place! Suggesting that I deceive my girl...' but Iruka really knew that it was his own fault. All the problems he'd had with the ramen girl were due to his own insecurities as she said. Maybe it was because he had grown up without the secure love of parents. That sort of unconditional love he had missed during his important adolescent formative years, when he started developing feelings for the opposite sex. His parents, after nearly thirteen years it was hard to remember them. The family pictures had all been destroyed in Kyuubi's attack.

Sometimes when he looked at himself in the mirror, he tried to place which part of his features came from which parent. 'I think I have my mother's eyes,' he would muse. 'I think I have my father's nose. The ears I can't remember at all. Who looks at ears anyway?' But then he was sorry that he couldn't remember their ears.

The sensitive young man thought about that time he had an argument with Ayame, when Iruka said she was lucky to have her father. But Ayame said he was lucky to have had two parents until he was twelve, while her mother died when she was much younger than that. "Are you trying to out-angst me?" he had accused. She had looked at him as if he should have been carried away by the shinobi medic psych department.

But it didn't matter when he lost his parents; the problem was he could barely remember what they looked like. What he did remember now was that feeling of being loved no matter what. No matter how poorly he did at the academy, he knew his parents would love him anyway. He remembered how softly but strongly his mother held him, how gentle she was when she dressed his wounds. He remembered how his dad made him laugh and did all sorts of cool tricks with disappearing shuriken, and juggling kunai. He remembered that feeling of warmth and security, that they loved him most in the whole world. He wanted those feelings back and he wanted them with Ayame.

Now he realized that in order to expect such unconditional love, he had to love unconditionally - he had to trust her, and love her, no matter what. She deserved that kind of supreme unselfish love.

-...-...-...-

Ayame was asked to help carry a sizable take-out order with the promise of a large tip. It was still before the dinner rush so she agreed to the man's request. He was not a good looking man at all. Not even cute like Iruka. But the heavy set man in a blue suit had flattered her and flirted with her, so thinking of vengeance against her ex for his little tricks, the naive young woman followed him. He chivalrously carried most of the order.

"So pretty lady, what is your name?" her new customer asked on the way. They were now outside the safety of Konoha's walls.

"Me?" People rarely ever asked her name. She was always the ramen girl or the Ichiraku waitress. "My name is Ayame," she blushed a bit.

"Ayame. That sure is a lovely name, a beautiful flower, perfect for such a beautiful young lady," the man said smoothly.

"Thank you very much, sir," Ayame said appreciatively while still blushing. 'This man is no looker, but he sure has a way with words.'

"So Ayame-san, a girl like you must have many suitors."

"Who me? Well...I have been seeing this one guy for a while," she admitted. Though originally she was thinking of using this man to make Iruka jealous, now she thought about how she missed her ex-paramour.

"Is he a shinobi?"

She nodded.

"Does he treat you well?"

"He's a liar and treats me like an idiot!" Ayame said heatedly, but in her heart she thought, 'No he's not. He's sweet and kind, generous and good. I can't blame him for being insecure. After all, I was obsessed with Kakashi for quite a while. If our situations were reversed, wouldn't I be jealous and insecure? Maybe Sakura has the right idea. He just needs someone to love him unconditionally.'

The man nodded at her words. "Some men just don't know how to treat a woman," he agreed, and then smiled at her conspiratorially.

Soon they approached the bamboo forest and were greeted by two other men. They were clad in gray shinobi-like uniforms, but like the first, they were plain to look at.

"I'm sorry about all this miss, but I'm going to have to ask you to hold out your hands so we can tie you up," said the first man apologetically as he took her bag. "Please comply with our orders, we don't want to hurt you." He had somehow instantly changed into the same attire as his comrades.

"Huh? Why? Why are you doing this? Why kidnap me? I'm just a ramen waitress, no one important. If you expect a hefty ransom, forget it. We're barely in the black. We're just scraping by. Our profit margin is very thin. There's a lot of overhead in the toppings you know though the noodles are fairly inexpensive..." Ayame tried to convince the heavy set man to let them go as one of the other men wound the rope around her wrists.

"I'm sorry, but it's not you we're after, it's your boyfriend."

"My boyfriend?"

"Yes, he stole my girl three years ago and I haven't forgiven him. It's time for him to pay!" The other two men nodded enthusiastically.

Ayame was surprised. Iruka sure did not seem like the type to steal someone else's girl. "There must be some mistake. He's not like that!"

"Hmmf. You just told me how he treated you. You think stealing my girl is beyond him?

Ayame thought seriously as she allowed them to bind her wrists. She believed in Iruka. There was no way he would stoop to something as low as that. The girl must not have been serious about this man in the first place. "Not too tight please," Ayame complained, "I am a working girl. If you hurt my wrists, how can I roll noodles or chop vegetables ever again?"

The youngest brother apologized and loosened her bonds a bit.

"What do you plan to do with me?" asked Ayame.

"Nothing. We just plan to keep you here for a while and wait for your boyfriend to rescue you. And when he comes, we'll be ready!" said the oldest brother.

"So what are you planning to do to him?" she asked worriedly.

"Ha, ha, ha, ha!" the three brothers ominously laughed in unison.

-...-...-...-

Although he knew it was a fake kidnapping, Iruka approached the bamboo forest cautiously. Who knew what Naruto had in stall for him. The enthusiastic genin probably wanted to make the rescue attempt to look really good and convincing. Maybe he even enlisted the help of his teammates. Sakura was not one to worry about, but that psycho Sasuke could get carried away - Iruka recalled the time Sasuke threatened him with his sharingan. And what if Naruto enlisted Kakashi's help? Then Iruka could be in super serious trouble. Kakashi appeared to have quite a mischievous streak. He would definitely enjoy giving Iruka a hard time. In any case, if Ayame were watching, he had to look competent.

Although Iruka was only a chuunin, he was very analytical and intelligent, in fact more so than some of the jounin like Gai and Anko who relied on brawn rather than brains. The veteran chuunin analyzed the situation. Why ask him to enter the bamboo forest instead of some other obscured area? What was special about bamboo?

'Bamboo is a grass, that can grow quite tall, over 100 feet, like a tree. It's flexible and light and is good for weaving baskets and constructing lightweight furniture or even huts. It's not good for weapons - too brittle and flexible. It's good for making ad hoc structures since it can be cut easily. Structures like traps!'

Iruka's senses were at maximum sensitivity. He listened carefully for the sound of an enemy's footsteps or breathing. His eyes darted from side to side and up and down. His nose tried to detect any strange odors, or the scent of Ayame (ramen and spices). He calmed himself to sense any foreign chakra. And he was careful to move in a zigzag pattern so an enemy could not easily attack him from behind. He then saw a little handwritten note with "This way to the goil" and an arrow pointing into the dense bamboo.

-...-...-...-

The brothers had forced Ayame to enter the shrine in the middle of the bamboo forest and then tied her to a chair in a small corner room. Ayame had plenty of time to think about her life and her relationships while the kidnappers left to deal with her ex-boyfriend. It had been only two days since the breakup but it was enough time for her to reflect back now without crying. Also, the anxiety of her or Iruka possibly being hurt focused her attention. So rather than continuing to be depressed, she used her energy to think how she could get herself free, help Iruka, and what she would do should they both survive.

She had to admit to herself (as there was no one else around) that she still loved the charming chuunin. She loved his long soft brown hair (so much better kept than her own), the ragged scar across his nose (which gave him such character), and the way he was like an open book with his feelings (it was really cute that he blushed more than she did when they read the Icha Icha books together). She knew (from some of her ramen customers) that he was the favorite sensei among the academy students, which meant that he would make a good father and loving husband. He was good and honest (always paid his bills on time), gentle and generous (always left her an extra top), sensible and sensitive (always gave her flowers for every occasion and he remembered them all), hardworking with a happy, positive attitude - most of the time. His only problem seemed to be an insecurity stemming from her initial obsession with Kakashi.

Despite all her attempts, he still did not trust her enough, or believe in himself enough, that she really did prefer him over Kakashi, that she loved him more than anyone else. What could she do to prove her love to him? What would it take to get it through his thick head? Her death? She shook her head and frowned at that thought.

The three men didn't seem particularly dangerous or cruel. If anything, they were rather nice. The ropes that bound her did not cut into her skin. There was enough slack that if she were a shinobi or even an experienced civilian, she would have been able to free herself easily. As it was, she knew nothing about knots. Still she instinctively, but futilely, strained against her bindings.

-...-...-...-

Iruka decided to first send in a bunshin as a decoy, in case Naruto or his teammates were lying in wait. Kakashi and Sasuke could easily distinguish a bunshin, and probably Sakura, but Naruto would be fooled, he reasoned. But in case the traps were triggered by weight, Iruka filled his pockets with stones. As the bunshin entered, Iruka matched its footsteps with stones, throwing them where the bunshin stepped. He camouflaged himself against the bamboo and shadowed his bunshin, while keeping an eye out for any trip wire.

The youngest of the Moya brothers saw the scarred nose shinobi approaching. He was watching from high up, on the tips of the tallest bamboo. 'What is he doing here? Where's Kakashi? Oh.wait I get it. These shinobi are capable of transforming themselves to look like someone else. Kakashi must be trying to trick us. He thinks we won't attack anyone but him. But I'm going to prove him wrong! We're smarter than that! Wait till that runny nose poison affects him - no woman will want a man with constant nasal drip! Ha-ha!' He threw a kunai down towards Iruka.

Eight stalks of bamboo tied down by a rope were released. They whipped through the bunshin causing it to immediately disperse. Iruka stepped back as the stalks continued to flail in front of him. He then noticed that the stalks were pierced with senbon coated with a black substance he assumed was poison.

'What the hell? Poison is pretty extreme even for Sasuke and Kakashi.' The chuunin analyzed the trajectory of the kunai. By its vertical placement, it had to come from directly above. Still in his camouflage mode, he concentrated chakra into his kunai, and swung it across the bamboo in front of him. The stalks fell over and he could hear an astonished yelp, the cracking of bamboo, and then a thump.

Iruka quickly followed the direction of the noise and found a man lying on the ground. He was about his age and dressed in pseudo shinobi gray robes wiith a forehead protector of a village he did not recognize. He could tell it was a real person, not a bunshin or transformation. "Are you from the.Question Mark Village? What the hell did you do with my girl!"

"You're not Kakashi? Who the hell are you?" the shinobi wannabe replied.

"I'm Umino Iruka, chuunin of Hidden Leaf Village and your executioner if you don't start answering some questions!" Iruka threatened impatiently.

The man's face blanched in fear. His voice trembled as he replied, "I'm one of the Moya brothers - see it's supposed to be haze on my forehead protector. We're out to get Kakashi, not you or the girl."

"Kakashi? What does he have to do with this?"

"He stole eldest brother's girl three years ago!"

"That bastard! I know exactly how he feels."

"Right, so you see where we're coming from."

"Yes, but what does this have to do with Ayame?"

"We thought she was his girl."

"No she's not! She's mine!"

"Sorry, we didn't realize.but why was she cursing you out and throwing noodles at you?"

"That's none of your business! Tell me how many of you there are and where she is!"

"There are just us three. The girl's at the shrine in the middle of the bamboo forest. OW! OW! I think I broke something. Help me." the man said as he tried to get up. A sharp stalk of bamboo had penetrated his thigh and blood dyed his gray uniform red.

"I'll come back for you later. If Ayame's okay I'll make sure you get some help, but if she's not, I'll come back and finish the job," Iruka said coldly as he headed deeper into the forest.

-.-.-.-

Iruka continued with the same strategy, camouflaging himself while shadowing his bunshin. But this time he was more wary of attacks from above.

'So this is not Naruto's doing. It's Kakashi's fault again! That bastard, stealing other guys' women. I'll never forgive him!' Iruka unfairly thought.

The second brother was crouching low, half buried in the soil, and hidden by the dense bamboo. He could not see Iruka's face well, only the lower half of the shinobi uniform appeared in front of him. He quickly threw a kunai with an exploding tag and a small pouch. The pouch was filled with super itching powder, the kind that cause skin lesions oozing with pus - no woman would ever want a guy like that.

The explosion took out the bunshin, and the itching powder scattered everywhere in a cloud of purplish dust. But to Iruka's luck, a sudden gust of wind blew the itching powder harmlessly away from him so that the chuunin was completely oblivious to what horrible disaster he had just avoided.

Iruka quickly ran toward the direction of the kunai, which appeared to be thrown from a low angle. He cautiously circled around, caught the man from the back in a chokehold, and held a kunai to his throat.

"What the hell? You're not Kakashi!" said the second brother who could now see that this shinobi wore no mask.

"No I'm not!" Iruka said as he delivered a strong chop to the base of the man's neck, knocking him out. He quickly tied the counterfeit shinobi's hands and ankles together, much like a trussed up pig.

-.-.-.-

The bamboo grew denser and denser as Iruka moved deeper in. There was little room to maneuver and the raspy stalks scratched at any exposed skin. His hands and face bore the worse of it. The cautious chuunin grew more and more impatient as he worried above his love, imagining all sorts of horrible torture the kidnappers may have employed. The first kidnapper had claimed she was in no danger, but how could he trust someone who dared to kidnap an innocent girl? He finally reached the middle of the bamboo forest and saw the old Shinto shrine just yards away in a small clearing.

The eldest Moya brother was inside the temple, watching from a window. 'He won't escape from this last trap! With the poison on the kunai, shuriken, and spikes, he will have flatulence all the time, for the rest of his life - no woman will ever want him! But wait.is that Kakashi?'

The bunshin proceeded without any problems, but Iruka felt the ground give way when he followed. He quickly leaped back as the ground exploded and racks of spikes crashed down from the left and right. Then another explosion as the spikes flew from the rack in all directions. Iruka blocked the spikes with his kunai, but more kunai and shuriken flew at him from multiple directions. Somehow Iruka survived the last trap without a scratch.

Iruka quickly ran the rest of the distance to the shrine and crashed through the window shoulder first. He dropped to the floor feet first and immediately tucked and rolled on the ground.

By the time the kidnapper overcame his surprise, Iruka was poised with his hand left hand at the man's throat while his right hand held a kunai ready to disembowel him with a flick of his wrist.

"You're not Kakashi! Who the hell are you?" the man managed to squeak out as sweat dripped down his face.

"I'm Umino Iruka, Hidden Leaf Chuunin, and Ayame's ...significant other," the young man replied.

"Significant other?"

"Well...I'm not exactly her boyfriend right now, but we were going out for a while...Hey I'm asking the questions here! And that's none of your business!"

"So where's Kakashi? The note was addressed to him."

"He's apparently on a mission."

"Damn! He'd abandon a damsel in distress. What a bastard!"

"Look, your brother told me about how that bastard stole your girl, but that was a long time ago. I don't blame you for wanting revenge, so I'll let you guys off easy this time, just don't do it again. I'm only a chuunin and I was able to take you all out. You have no chance against Kakashi. He's an inconsiderate girl stealing bastard, but he's a top shinobi. You guys don't want to die do you?"

"No, sigh, I guess you're right. But hey, I have to ask you, I had a good talk with Ayame-chan. You guys seriously broke up? Mind if I..."

"No! You three stay away from her! She's mine! Where is she?"

"You know, from what she's told me, you don't deserve her..."

That was the last straw and Iruka finally lost it. He punched the guy squarely in the jaw with a right cross then a left hook. The shinobi wannabe fell to the ground unconscious and Iruka headed to the back of the temple.

-.-.-.-

Kakashi's Mission

Sasuke was just about to cook dinner, or rather microwave his leftover lunch (the talk with Ayame had made him lose his appetite), when he heard the doorbell ring.

He found his sensei leaning against the doorframe reading his book.

"Something come up?" Sasuke asked his sensei unenthusiastically.

"An unofficial mission," Kakashi replied mysteriously.

"Where's the other two?"

"It's just the two of us. It's a special mission that requires.discretion," his sensei explained vaguely.

Sasuke looked at his superior doubtfully. 'Special discrete mission, yeah right, to him that's probably stealing porn from the bookstore.'

"It involves a kidnapping."

That got Sasuke's attention.

"The ramen girl has been kidnapped. And we're going to help Iruka sensei save her without his knowledge."

Sasuke just looked at his sensei and cocked an eyebrow at his more peculiar than usual antics.

"According to the latest shinobi gossip, the two have been having some problems. It just so happens that the ramen girl got in the middle of a vendetta against me. Now I could go ahead and rescue her in about two shakes of a lamb's tail, but I think it's better to give Iruka-sensei that chance, with a little help from us.just in case." Despite the perverted books Kakashi read, he was apparently a romantic, or a fool, at heart.

Sasuke just shrugged and said, "Whatever, let's go."

-...-...-...-

"See, Iruka sensei's not doing too badly," Kakashi whispered to Sasuke as they watched Iruka take out the first guy.

"So let's leave," muttered Sasuke in reply.

"Well, there might be more traps. We'd better make sure the ramen girl's okay first."

When Kakashi saw the pouch attached to the kunai with an explosive tag, he immediately knew that it had to contain some kind of poison or sleep powder or more explosives. He quickly performed the katas for a wind jutsu to blow the powder away from the chuunin. Sasuke had wanted to use a fireball, but decided after quick consideration that it would be too conspicuous and could cause a rampaging forest fire, which would defeat the purpose of trying to save the ramen girl.

The two continued to move ahead of Iruka, keeping their chakra muted, weaving around the dense bamboo. At the next trap, they both reacted quickly to the flurry of kunai and shuriken headed toward the oblivious chuunin. Their kunai and shuriken deflected the ones that Iruka could not.

-...-...-...-

And They Lived Happily Ever After

There she was in a back corner room, tied to a chair and apparently asleep! 'How like her to be so oblivious in a dangerous situation,' Iruka thought fondly as he quickly ran over to untie his love.

Ayame stopped snoring, woke up, and yawned. "About time!" she muttered as Iruka cut the rope binding her arms and legs.

"Ayame-chan, I'm sorry about everything, I ." Iruka started to say before she cut him off.

"Shut up. I don't want to hear any more," she said while rubbing her wrists, red from rope burn.

Iruka looked at her in abject astonishment at her curtness and lack of gratitude.

But then she took a deep breath and said, "I love you, only you, no one else, well, except my dad but that doesn't count. I'd love you even if you had chronic post nasal drip, or were covered in oozing sores, well, as long as they weren't too contagious, and even if you expelled gas all day. I want you to believe that. I will keep saying I love you until you do believe it."

"I do believe you, I know you do," he replied while thinking, 'How gross, I don't suffer from any of those conditions, where does she come up with that weird stuff?' "But I." he was about to said that he was the one who should be saying all that but she cut him off again.

"Umino Iruka sensei, will you marry me?"

"What? You can't ask me that!" he said in surprise and embarrassment. His face turned its characteristics shade of red, which made him even cuter and more endearing.

"Is that a no?" Ayame asked with a mock frown.

"No. I mean yes. I mean I'm the one who has to ask!"

"Well, I'm waiting."

'Um.wouldn't it be better in a nicer environment?" Iruka hesitated. He had imagined lots of flowers (Ino would be ecstatic) and a romantic dinner at his place, not a dusty, moldy old shrine.

"No! Ask me now before you change your mind," she ordered in case he got cold feet or reverted back to his wishy washy self.

"Okay, right." 'I can do this!' Iruka took a deep breath before saying, "Ayame-chan, I love you more than anyone or anything else in this entire world. I trust you completely and I swear I'll never doubt you again. Will you do me the great honor of becoming my. permanent partner in life and beyond?" 'There, I think that's a good non-sexist way to ask. Independent working women like Ayame should appreciate that.'

"Permanent partner in life and beyond? If that means wife then it's a yes!" Ayame jumped into Iruka's arms and threw her arms around his neck. Luckily Iruka still had the strength and stamina to hold her up. She moved a hand to caress the scar across his nose, then rubbed his nose with hers while removing his forehead protector and hairband so that she could run her fingers through his hair, which unfortunately was quite dirty and sweaty by now, but a woman in love couldn't care less about such things. Her hands moved from his hair to hold his face still as she kissed his forehead, his scarred nose, and finally his lips.

-.-.-.-

"Don't you just love happy endings?" Kakashi asked his disciple. The two had been discretely watching through the window.

"Pathetic," muttered Sasuke, "they haven't even notice we're here. We could've just snuck up to them and slit both their throats."

Kakashi shook his head and sighed at Sasuke's lack of romance. He then pulled Sasuke away from the window as the couple was becoming a bit too intimate to be witnessed by a twelve year old.

-.-.-.-

Thus ends the romantic adventures of Ayame the ramen girl who finally found love with a shinobi, albeit not the one she originally wanted. But that's often what occurs in real life. Don't fall for fool's gold when a diamond in the rough is available or as Ayame's father would say: "Ordering plain ramen to takeout is better than the House Special or anything else because that way you don't have to wait, and you can add your own toppings and adjust it to your taste." Remember that true love can survive numerous obstacles and in the end is worth all the pain and suffering, or as Ayame's father would say, "A long lasting loving relationship is like making ramen from scratch. It's difficult and takes a lot of work, but the more effort you put into it the better it will be."

So the turbulent couple finally settled down to have 2.5 children, two of whom became shinobi and 0.5 inherited the ramen stand. They lived a long and happy life with uncle Kakashi and his team making occasional visits to baby sit.


-.-.THE END.-.-